Blessings 395 - 406

395. Friend to watch the kids during...


396. An awesome counseling appointment. Yes, you read that right. It didn't start off so great because I was told the wrong time for the appointment, so it started a half hour late which meant Ed could no longer be part of it. He had a conference call he had to leave for for work. But it was fine that just I was there to check in with our counselor.


397. One reason it was so great was because she really CELEBRATED what the Lord did for Ed and I. I have the habit of saying and thinking, yeah, it's so weird that things are great now, when it's not WEIRD at all. She reminded me and encouraged me to change my thinking and vocabulary and see that it's actually God being WONDER-FULL. I have no idea how He did it, but things have been GREAT the lsat few weeks. Praise Him.


398. Seeing even her get teary-eyed over that amazing turn of events.


399. A song on the radio that we talked about - I Need a Miracle by Third Day.

Well, late one night, she started to cry and thought he ain’t coming home
She was tired of the lies, tired of the fight, but she didn’t want to see him go
She fell on her knees and said, “I haven’t prayed since I was young
But Lord above I need a miracle”
Well no matter who you are and no matter what you’ve done
There will come a time when you can’t make it on your own
And in your hour of desperation
Know you’re not the only one, praying
Lord above, I need a miracle
I need a miracle
He lost his job and all he had in the fall of ’09
Now he feared the worst, that he would lose his children and his wife
So he drove down deep into the woods and thought he’d end it all
And prayed, “Lord above, I need a miracle”
Well no matter who you are and no matter what you’ve done
There will come a time when you can’t make it on your own
And in your hour of desperation
Know you’re not the only one, praying
Lord above, I need a miracle
I need a miracle

He turned on the radio to hear a song for the last time
He didn’t know what he was looking for or even what he’d find
The song he heard gave him hope and strength to carry on
And on that night, they found a miracle
They found a miracle

In your hour of desperation
Know you’re not the only one, praying
Lord above, I need a miracle
I need a miracle

400. I have loved Christian radio during this hard time, but I actually pretty much hated this song. I found it super annoying and would turn the radio right off. I thought it was stupid and hokey and that God would not work like that in my life. That, obviously, it would take YEARS to repair what Ed and I had going on - not just one night. I can't believe, now, that I thought so little of God's power. This is exactly what He did for us. On a drive up to Traverse City, during a span of 3 hours, God turned both Ed's and my hopes from a 1 on a scale of 1-10 to a 9. Literally, when we talked with our counselor the next week, her jaw dropped because she knew where we were at (a 1 on the scale of HOPE), and then Ed said 9. Wow. 3 hours, and my life did a 180-degree turn. God DID a miracle for Ed and I. That's exactly what He did.


401. Learning FROM GOD the difference between trusting and believing. I did trust Him. It was SO hard because I wanted to trust my emotions, but I didn't. I trusted Him. And apparently, I barely even believed Him and what He would do, as evidenced by my reaction to that Miracle song. But thankfully, SO THANKFULLY, God didn't even ask me to believe He'd do it. He just asked me to trust Him. Trust and Obey. Through His power and seeking Him EVERY DAY through my BSF study, my awesome Christian family and friends, music, and prayer. I was hanging by a thread there at the end, but God never left me and He saved me.


402. Again and again, He saves me.


403. Philippians 1:6 which THE HOLY SPIRIT GAVE TO ME YESTERDAY. "...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."


404. I almost didn't do my BSF yesterday because I had a lot of other stuff to get done before the kids got up, but I figured, I have 15 minutes. God so blessed me in spending this time with Him. I read about how Rebekah believed God's promises for her and her family, e.g. that her younger son would receive the blessing and birthright, but how she lied and used human efforts to gain that promise for her son, Jacob. I was so encouraged to hear that whatever promises God has given to me, I don't have to worry about how He's going to deliver them. I can stop trying to grasp at them and claw for them and stop using my human efforts to have these promises fulfilled. I can just pray about them and sit back and watch God do all the work. So, I was led to Phil 1:6 and wrote it on a notecard and put it front and center on my kitchen window to remind me of this in my life right now.


405. Speaking with my counselor later in the day, she asked me what issues I felt Ed and I may need to handle carefully in the future. I said the issues of us wanting different things out of life. The desires of my heart seem to be very different than the desires of His heart. But God has showed me that I don't need to try to change Ed. I can't change Ed. I can pray that the Holy Spirit will align our desires, but I can't change Ed's desires with my own efforts. I can't and I shouldn't try - it does NO good. My counselor then wanted me to think about a verse that would remind me of this in the future, or a picture, or someTHING that would help me to remember this REVELATION from God. And that's what I think this is - a revelation from God. I said yeah, I'll think about it, and then SHE SAID, "Maybe that one about God being faithful to complete the good work He's begun in you.." Philippians 1:6. I teared up, cried, shared how I had read that verse and been touched by it that morning. We celebrated the moment together - the Holy Spirit had given me my verse.


406. And I'm blessed by this verse, too: "Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4